So, Your Boss is Driving You Crazy?

by Jon Lewis, Managing Director, Michael Lord & Company

It's a sad reality that in a market where many law firms and companies have gone through significant downsizing some supervisors have become considerably more demanding of those fortunate souls who still have jobs. Bosses themselves face the stress of getting the work done with fewer bodies, and are well aware that their remaining employees have far fewer exit options available.

So, what do you do when your boss is killing you with such workplace plagues as excessive work, unreasonable deadlines, inadequate guidance, disrespectful behavior, etc.? Sadly, for most, the idea of confronting your persecutor with a heart-felt "take this job and shove it" is nothing more than an oh-so-sweet pipedream. But assuming that you don’t have the luxury of quitting, here are a number of constructive steps you can take:

• Assess the Situation Honestly
  Do you really have an impossible boss? REALLY??? Sometimes, blaming the boss for your troubles can be an all-too-convenient way to avoid a painful but necessary exercise in self-assessment. Before you do anything else, step back and try to determine the real causes of your difficulties. As much as possible, look at the problems which have arisen from your boss' perspective rather than your own (you can be darn sure that’s what they are doing). If it helps, talk this through with a friend whom you can trust to be more objective than you might be. Are those deadlines truly unreasonable, or have you been taking too many two-hour lunches? Are you really receiving too little guidance, or have you been failing to take sufficient initiative? Your boss may indeed be an ogre, but make sure you have taken a good long look in the mirror before reaching that conclusion.
• Stay Calm
  If you are being mistreated by your boss, you will undoubtedly be feeling a very strong sense of frustration and anger (if not, congratulations, you've achieved a level of inner peace that makes reading the rest of this unnecessary!) Remember, though, what matters most is finding effective ways to address the situation. Be sure to stay calm in dealing with difficult supervisors, and don't burn bridges too quickly. Even if you get some immediate satisfaction from telling your boss exactly what you think of him or her, the memory of that moment of joy may not be sufficient comfort if you end up losing your job and can't find a new one.
• Seek Help From Colleagues and Predecessors
  If your boss is really a tyrant, odds are strong that you are not his or her first victim. Others who have worked with him or her in the past may be able to offer some strategies they have utilized to more successfully interact with your supervisor. Seeking such guidance can also serve as a useful reality check: if everybody else acts surprised by your inquiry and thinks your boss is a sweetheart, go back to step 1 above, quick!
• Communicate
  Ask your boss to schedule a meeting to discuss your problems. If he or she is receptive this can help clear the air; if not, you can at least let others know that you tried. Make sure that you take the right tone here—as appealing as it may seem, this is not the time to confront your supervisor with a laundry list of complaints, no matter how justified they may be. You are far more likely to get good results if you instead let your boss know that you would like to improve your relationship by finding ways to better do your job, and help him or her in doing theirs.
• Consider Speaking With HR
  Discussing your problems with your employer's human resources department is a logical idea (that's what they are there for, after all), and this can often be a very useful step. Be aware, though, that doing this comes with the cost that you may lose control of the situation. Once HR gets involved, things can sometimes ratchet up quickly, and such situations of course do not always end well for everyone (or sometimes anyone!) involved. While others may disagree on this, my personal advice would be to delay going to HR at least until you have exhausted all other avenues of addressing the situation on your own.
• Be Flexible in Looking for Greener Pastures
  There are, of course, some bosses who really are impossible to deal with, no matter how hard you try to make things work. No one should ever put up with a boss who is truly abusive. In such cases, an exit may really be the only solution. You can and should explore other employment opportunities at the same time you are attempting to improve your current situation. Even in a difficult job market, there are usually some other opportunities to be found, but you may need to make some compromises to take advantage of them. Relocating to another city or accepting a position with lower pay may not be ideal, but if you really need to get away from a psycho boss, such trade-offs may be worth making.

Jon Lewis is a Managing Director with Michael Lord & Company. Jon graduated from Yale Law School and Wesleyan University and is formerly a trademark counsel at Joseph E. Seagram & Company and an associate at the predecessor firm to the New York City office of Dorsey & Whitney. His direct dial is 646.431.3431, and his email address is jon@mlordco.com.

© 2011 by Michael Lord & Company, New York, NY and Wilton, CT. All rights reserved.